The year 2020 has been one that is not for the lighthearted. From Saharan Sandstorms to Murder Hornets, it seems this year has thrown us all kinds of curveballs. Maybe those people on Doomsday Preppers are on to something after all? That’s why we put together Tifosi’s 2020 Survival Essentials!
A Hard Copy of Wikipedia
When the solar flare wipes out the Internet, you’ll need to pass down today’s human knowledge to tomorrow’s (mutant?) children. That’s why you should print out the entirety of Wikipedia! And yes, it will take some time and some paper, but it will be worth it in those moments when you find yourself wondering how brain eating amoebas migrated to your homeland in the first place.
Flintstones Vitamins
If a natural disaster occurs or murder hornets do end up running rampant over the world and you must go into hiding, you’ll still need to get all your nutrients. That’s why we’re taking our Flintstones Vitamins with us. As a child, it was one of our favorite moments in the day when mom yelled it was time for our vitamins, now we get to relive those memories (even from our bunker).
Masso Safety Glasses
These safety glasses come equipped with shatterproof polycarbonate lenses and a Grilamid TR-90 NZZ frame that will provide total eye protection from the debris of those deorbited satellites that started raining down on earth. And since they come with a clear or smoke lens, you can use them for any outdoor setting that the apocalypse brings.
Hand Crank Radio
A hand crank radio will take a lot more effort than a rechargeable one, but let’s say the power goes out in your bunker and you still want to hear your favorite Hamilton song that was playing on repeat in better times? A hand crank radio can provide that…and I guess it can come in handy for that martial law announcement.
Duct Tape
There are a hundred reasons why you will need duct tape, such as, using it to patch up your tent or insulate boots. But it’s also great for fashioning a purse or wallet! You may laugh but style is still important, right?
Sprouting and Planting Seeds
Eventually, all the Twinkies will be raided and your Spam will expire. That’s why having enough seeds to get you fresh food and nutrients will be important! Plus having a garden will be super relaxing in times of stress.
Rain Water Barrel
A rain barrel is a simple option that you can use to create a water collection system of some kind. Keep these on your property to capture rainwater over time and bring yourself your favorite Kool-Aid powder flavor. You’re going to need something delicious to wash down those Flintstone Vitamins!
Two Way Walkie Talkie
Walkie Talkies will come in handy if you are with other people and you need to get out of the bunker but stay in touch with one another. Be sure to read up on your Walkie Talkie lingo so that you can impress strangers when you use them.
Geiger Counter
We’ve talked a lot about the things you’ll need for outside the bunker, but you’ll need to know when it’s safe to leave! A Geiger Counter can measure ionizing radiation, so in the case that The Terminator movies were right and robots have overthrown us in nuclear warfare, this little gadget will be valuable.
That One Book You Never Had Time to Read
Living life in a bunker may sound exciting but eventually you will get bored. Grab that book beside your nightstand that you’ve been telling yourself you will read but never have. You’ll definitely have time now!
While we’re only a little over halfway through 2020, the year has been relentless so far. While we hope things will get better, we can’t be certain. So be sure to print this list and go through the rest of the year with peace of mind that if there is a disaster, you’re prepared!
